by Pastor Tim Burt
Do you think you ever give out fake love? What do I mean by fake love? Inside you may be feeling many things toward someone but love is not one of them. But, since you are supposed to love that person, even though you aren’t feeling it, you give out your fake love and then roll your eyes as you walk away or talk behind their back later. That’s what I mean by fake love.
Romans 12:9 KJV says these words: “Let love be without dissimulation.” The word dissimulation in the Greek means let your love be without hypocrisy—don’t let it be fake. Don’t put on a smile and pretend to love someone and then as you walk away, roll your eyes and later say something mean or cruel to someone else about that person. That’s dissimulation. It’s something that’s done of course by the world around you, but also by Christians, every day! Fake love which is not love at all, is given out every day. Other translations of Romans 12:9 say, “Let love be sincere.”
In my early years as a Christian, I thought giving fake love was just a normal part of life. I couldn’t just say everything I was really thinking and dump on someone could I? Even those closest to you make you mad. If I would have let my mouth and feelings cut loose and always said what I was thinking, I would have constantly been in trouble. So my fix was, put on my fake smile, say the right things, and occasionally roll my eyes as I walked away. That is until the Lord began to deal with me about this.
One day I was reading in the book of Romans when I read Romans 12:9 KJV, “Let love be without dissimulation.” Suddenly the Lord chastised me. He reminded me of a conversation with someone I had been upset with the day before. The Lord said, You put on a nice show but you aren’t being sincere in your love toward him. You affirmed that things were great, but as you walked away, you were rolling your eyes thinking anything but that. There was no argument from me. I knew I was guilty. I asked the Lord to help me be sincere in my love toward this person and others that got under my skin. He really taught me how simple it is. He said, “Tim, when you love people with your love, it is often measured by their behavior or getting what you want. If you don’t get what you want, you’re not feeling the love of God with them. You’re probably at odds with them! He continued, My love is pure. It is honest. It is FULL of mercy. It is forgiving. It is patient. It isn’t there one second and gone the next. It isn’t looking for perfection in performance. IT COMES AS A GIFT! I don’t love you based on your performance. I love you period! If you love people through my eyes and with my heart, you’ll find it much easier. I was in awe as God spoke those words to my heart. It was so easy and so clear! Wow!
It was amazing how those words and that revelation transformed my life. As I moved forward, the Lord would constantly remind me: Be sincere. No fake love. My love is greater than the moment. It’s the relationship, not the temporary problem. I love them and so you love them with my love! I began to see my love run deeper and deeper and the circumstance or problem as just something to work through in prayer and with God’s help. Because people could literally see and feel the sincerity of my love, it changed even difficult situations. It increased my favor with them. They could sense that I cared more about them than the problem. People were so much more yielding in working through issues. I was finally getting God’s kind of love across—a sincere love instead of my fake love in difficult moments—the kind of love He shows me daily! It was this that finally brought revelation and insight to Proverbs 16:7 (NIV). “When a man’s ways are pleasing to the LORD, he makes even his enemies live at peace with him.” My ways are pleasing to the Lord when I sincerely love people with His love!
Over the years, I have learned how important it is to let sincere love lead the way. Sincere love or loving others with God’s kind of love, diminishes the expectation of performance or how they treated you! Even if they fail, (and oh so many people do,) you can know that you didn’t and feel like you obeyed God. The reward of doing so is that it keeps God’s favor and blessing working in your life.
Proverbs 17:9 (NIV) says, “He who covers over an offense promotes love, but whoever repeats the matter separates close friends.”
All relationships are valuable. Relationships are the primary way God reaches people. Relationships are also the primary way God brings blessings into our lives. So, let your love be sincere. Let it rise up out of the same love God in His mercy and grace has extended to you (despite your daily failures.) His love is unlimited and our love can be powerfully and deeply expanded as we practice giving out His sincere love—not two-faced fake love!
Colossians 3:12-14 (NLT) “Since God chose you to be the holy people he loves, you must clothe yourselves with tenderhearted mercy, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience. Make allowance for each other’s faults, and forgive anyone who offends you. Remember, the Lord forgave you, so you must forgive others. Above all, clothe yourselves with love, which binds us all together in perfect harmony.”
In His love,
Pastor Tim Burt
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