We hear a great deal about tolerance today. We’re told that we should respect people who think differently, believe differently, and live differently than we do. And you know what? There is something very biblical about treating people with dignity and respect even when we strongly disagree with them. But have you noticed something strange? Sometimes the same culture that celebrates tolerance has considerably less tolerance when someone’s beliefs come directly from the Bible. We hear, “We must tolerate people who believe differently.” Yet sometimes it seems there is an unspoken exception: “Unless their beliefs are biblical.”
Now, before we point fingers at anyone else, we, as Christians, need to examine ourselves too. God never gave us permission to be rude, arrogant, cruel, or hateful simply because we believe we’re standing for truth. Having biblical convictions doesn’t excuse ungodly behavior. Jesus was full of both grace and truth. He never compromised God’s truth to make people comfortable, but neither did He use truth as a weapon to humiliate people. That’s an important distinction.
Some people seem to believe that loving someone means agreeing with them. It doesn’t. If someone you love is walking toward danger, love doesn’t stand silently and applaud. Love cares enough to speak. At the same time, truth without love can become harsh and self-righteous. We’ve probably all encountered someone who was technically right about something but delivered it in such an unloving way that nobody wanted to listen! God calls us to something better.
Imagine a doctor discovering something serious during an examination. Would we call that doctor loving if he hid the diagnosis because he didn’t want to upset the patient? Of course not! We would expect him to tell the truth, but we’d also hope he would tell it with compassion, wisdom, and a desire to help. That’s a wonderful picture of how Christians should handle biblical truth.
There is another side to this that we shouldn’t overlook. Sometimes Christians become frustrated or even rude because we know what we believe, but we haven’t learned God’s Word well enough to explain why we believe it. When we can’t articulate the truth clearly, it’s easy to fall back on trying to “slam dunk” the other person instead. But winning an argument isn’t the same thing as reaching a heart.
Part of growing spiritually is learning God’s Word well enough that we can communicate His truth accurately, thoughtfully, and effectively. Peter tells us to be ready to explain the hope that is within us, but then he tells us how to do it: “But do this in a gentle and respectful way.” (1 Peter 3:15 NLT) That’s part of God’s plan for our growth. We should continually be getting better, not only at knowing what we believe, but at communicating it in a way that gives someone else the opportunity to understand it.
We don’t have to surrender our convictions to demonstrate love, and we don’t have to surrender love to demonstrate our convictions. This becomes especially important when biblical beliefs become unpopular. There may be times when standing upon God’s Word costs us approval, friendships, opportunities, or acceptance. Jesus never promised that following Him would always make us popular. But our goal isn’t to win arguments. Our goal is to represent Jesus well.
So when someone disagrees with your biblical beliefs, resist the temptation to become angry or defensive. Listen. Be respectful. Show kindness. Know God’s Word and learn how to communicate it effectively. And when the opportunity comes, don’t be ashamed of what God’s Word says. You can disagree without being disagreeable. You can have conviction without condemnation. You can love someone deeply without pretending that truth doesn’t matter.
God never asked us to choose between truth and love. He showed us how they belong together:
Ephesians 4:15 NLT “Instead, we will speak the truth in love…”
Prayer: Father, help me to represent You well in a world where biblical truth is not always welcomed. Give me courage to stand upon Your Word and the humility and compassion to treat every person with dignity and respect. Help me grow in my knowledge of Your Word and in my ability to communicate Your truth effectively. May my words and actions always reflect both Your truth and Your love. In Jesus’ name, Amen.
