When I was a young man and newly married, I was at a different emotional level. I was young. I was immature. I was a new Christian, just beginning to learn the Bible and seeking God about the changes He wanted me to make in my life. I sincerely wanted to be a great husband but was fully aware that I was making plenty of mistakes and failing miserably. I wore my emotions on my sleeve and too often felt provoked by my new wife, who was also young and immature. There were times I would erupt like a volcano. I am ashamed of those days. I thank God for His transforming word and for the ever-present help of the Holy Spirit, who helped me completely change and mature. And I am so glad those years are now far in the past.
Anger is a valid and God-given emotion, but it has a boundary—a line that can too easily be crossed. Ephesians 4:26-27 (NIV) instructs us: “In your anger do not sin…” This verse is both instructional and insightful. God clearly teaches that anger itself is not sin, but it can be carried to the point of sin. If we continue reading, we also find that when anger does cross its boundary, it can give the devil a foothold. The Greek word for "foothold" literally means “giving the devil occupancy—a place to dwell.”
For some people, their anger not only crosses the line into sin, but they are practically inviting the devil to sit down at their table and sign a long-term lease to live with them. How does that happen?
Unrestrained anger leads to all kinds of outbursts that cause regret. People who sin in their anger seldom stay focused on the issue they’re upset about. Instead, they are quickly drawn into the archive of past offenses, bringing them into heated words, and emotions. This causes anger to swell and often erupt like a volcano. The more anger grows, the more clear thinking leaves the room. You are then left with irrational thoughts which only continue to provoke even more anger and rage. Unbridled anger or rage leads to irrational behavior, which can then spiral into every kind of evil, including dangerous actions. James 3:16 (KJV) puts it this way: “For where envying and strife is, there is confusion and every evil work.” It's at this point, that you've give the devil a real foothold.
This is when destructive words cause real emotional damage to anyone in their path. In many cases, they leave long-term wounds that people may or may not recover from. If they do recover, they are often left with scars in their memory banks that only Jesus can remove through supernatural forgiveness. When anger takes dominance over clear thinking, the devil has taken up residence—he has a foothold in your life.
God’s wisdom warns us of the danger of letting anger cross the line. Proverbs 27:4 (NIV) says, “Anger is cruel and fury overwhelming…” Proverbs 14:17 (NIV) says, “A quick-tempered man does foolish things…” Jails are filled with people who have become victims of their own anger.
So what is God's plan for overcoming and managing anger appropriately? You need to take on God’s temperament. Psalm 103:8 (KJV) reveals, “The LORD is merciful and gracious, slow to anger, and plenteous in mercy.” God isn’t expecting people to reach His perfection. He sent Jesus to do that. Jesus was the only one who could. We've been given the love of God to operate through the Holy Spirit that helps us learn to forgive quickly, remember our own perfections, reflect on God's grace toward us, and apply that same grace toward others. This is a process to practice that helps us put pinholes in anger the second we are provoked. Reflecting on God's grace and love toward us in our stupidity, is what helps us become stronger and stronger in overlooking offense and applying His grace toward others. This transformed my life! It will transform anyone's life.
To keep anger from turning to rage, limit how much you dwell on offenses. Ask yourself: Am I making a mountain out of a molehill? There's a good chance you are! If so, don’t! Let it go. When angered, pause your thoughts and evaluate them. Speak few words about it—words fuel anger’s growth. Pray and ask God to help you forgive. Think about why you like or love that person. Seek forgiveness for your own faults in the moment of your anger toward someone else. Finally, pray for that person with a spirit of love and faith, sincerely desiring to help them. If you don’t feel like it, do it anyway by faith, because God instructs you to. When you do this, you’ll find that your emotions will follow your faith. The other person may or may not respond the right way, but regardless, you can always make the choice and do what's right. And in doing so, you’ll get stronger at controlling your emotions and anger.
Practice this continually, and God will do a mighty work in you, changing your character in this area and helping you mature. And in the big picture, like me, you’ll become an entirely new person—the person God always intended you to be. And you will be so glad. And so blessed!
Proverbs 16:32 (NIV) "Better a patient man than a warrior, a man who controls his temper than one who takes a city."
In His love,
Pastor Tim Burt
