If you’re anything like me, you may sometimes struggle to find adequate words of thanksgiving for the Lord’s love, mercy, and forgiveness. His willingness to give us a fresh start—again and again—is astounding. His love rises above our failures. Even when we stumble in foolishness, He keeps reaching out.
We all mess up at times—hopefully less as we mature in Christ. But what do we do when we’ve blown it through sinful behavior, bad attitudes, or angry reactions?
For the non-Christian, the starting point is simple:
Ask Jesus to be Lord of your life. Ask Him to forgive your sins. Ask Him to fill you with the Holy Spirit. Then find a Bible-teaching church, read your Bible, and surround yourself with Christian friends. That is the doorway to a new life.
But for Christians who feel ashamed because they’ve messed up more times than they think God could possibly forgive, Scripture points us to something powerful—godly sorrow.
2 Corinthians 7:10 (NIV) says, “Godly sorrow brings repentance that leads to salvation and leaves no regret, but worldly sorrow brings death.”
The phrase “repentance that leads to salvation” comes from the Greek word soteria, meaning rescue, restoration, health, and wholeness. Godly sorrow is the heart-deep recognition that we sinned against God, and we desire to turn back fully to Him.
Worldly sorrow, on the other hand, isn’t sorrow for the sin—it’s sorrow for the consequences. It’s regret over the mess we made, the embarrassment we caused, or the trouble we’re experiencing. And worldly sorrow never produces real change. It leads only to repeated mistakes and spiritual decline.
After 37 years of ministry, I can tell you that many Christians feel regret for their trouble—not their sin. I’ve seen it especially in cases of adultery. Someone gets caught, and the tears come—but often the sorrow is over the fallout, not the violation of God’s Word or the wounds inflicted on a spouse, children, and family. Some even consider staying in the sinful relationship despite the destruction it causes.
Being called a “Christian” doesn’t make the heart sincere. God sees the truth. 1 John 2:3–4 (NIV) reminds us: “We know that we have come to know Him if we obey His commands. Whoever says, ‘I know Him,’ but does not do what He commands is a liar, and the truth is not in that person.”
If a person continually sins without godly sorrow, without regard for God’s Word or the pain they cause others, the enemy will draw them into deeper darkness. Sin blinds. Eventually they lose all sensitivity to God and trade His values for the cravings of the flesh. God does not force us into obedience. He lovingly influences and invites us—but if we refuse, He allows our choice.
Romans 1:24 (NIV) says, “Therefore God gave them over to the sinful desires of their hearts…”
A common question arises: “My Christian friend is living in sin and shows no godly sorrow. Should I reach out to them?”
You can try—but understand that their heart may be hard. Sin blinds spiritual vision; they truly cannot see what you see. Scripture compares a hardened heart to fallow ground—rain rolls right off. Only constant, persistent prayer can soften it.
Hosea 10:12 (NKJV) says, “…Break up your fallow ground; for it is time to seek the LORD, till He comes and rains righteousness on you.”
So yes—pray for them. Stand in the gap for them. Especially if you know they aren’t evil—they’re simply lost.
2 Timothy 2:24–26 (NLT) teaches us to gently instruct those who oppose the truth, praying that God will open their eyes and help them escape the enemy’s trap.
Paul prayed the same:
“…that the eyes of your understanding being enlightened…” — Ephesians 1:16–18 (NKJV)
Sometimes, the best way to love someone living in rebellion is to pray from a distance. Praying from afar protects your own heart from disappointment and keeps you steady in faith. We often hear about praying mothers—but I want you to know there are just as many praying fathers, grandparents, and friends who refuse to give up on someone they love.
Don’t judge those who’ve strayed. Jesus loves them. He died for them. Don’t preach condemnation—they already feel it, even if they hide it. If you say anything, let it be a reminder of God’s love. And then be ready, like the father of the prodigal son, to embrace them when they return.
And if this message isn’t about someone else—but about you—then fall to your knees. Tell the Lord you’re truly sorry. Ask Him to strengthen you to do what is right. He will answer. Real godly sorrow desires change—and God will honor that desire.
Romans 6:16 (NLT) says it plainly:
“Don’t you realize that you become the slave of whatever you choose to obey? … You can choose to obey God, which leads to righteous living.”
Choose Him. Choose righteousness.
And let His love restore you fully.
