The Impact of Words in Life and Relationships – Part One

Fresh Manna
by Pastor Tim Burt

A few years ago, Renee and I had to remodel two of our bathrooms. After 20 years, one of them in particular had some moisture problems. Some of the frame work had to be ripped out and redone because the moisture got into some of the sheet rock and framework and created mold.

In the same way, over time, some of the framework of our lives suffers from deterioration. In the early days of your relationship with your spouse, words of love poured out. Long conversations flowed with interest and excitement. And hugs and embraces carried great affection. You may also have been a champion at creating and giving beautiful letters, cards, poems, and creative ways to express your love and your heart. Your love structure was new, fresh, and solid!

But then, over time, deteriorating forces began to creep in. No one intentionally means to be the vessel that brings deterioration to something that was once so greatly cherished, but it happens. Somehow we begin to notice faults that love initially caused us to overlook. Then we begin to mark them in our mind until they become irritating. Negative thinking begins to gain momentum and for the first time, words are expressed regarding those negative thoughts. Anger or tears or both flow! Words of love are slowly replaced by complaints and they soon leech into the fabric of the relationship. When that happens, deterioration began.

The old saying, “Sticks and stones may break my bones but words can never hurt me,” is one of the greatest lies and fallacies ever taught a child. Good and gracious and merciful words bring life to a situation or relationship. Negative and angry words can erode that which was once wonderful, ultimately leading to the deterioration and death of a relationship. Proverbs 18:21 says, “The tongue has the power of life and death, and those who love it will eat its fruit.” This is telling us that our words have great power to produce life and blessing. Life-giving words can create, enhance, and frame something making it beautiful.  Or, negative and angry words can tear down and destroy what was once beautiful. And in record time! God created this beautiful world with His words. Satan, the liar, deceiver and destroyer of all things and been working to destroy every element of God’s creation and especially life-giving relationships! It’s a terrifying thought I know, to think that your words could be the handiwork of Satan to destroy. But, when you give over to wrong thinking and let emotions and words fly (that you know are wrong,) that is who you are yielding to.

What’s God’s plan? Hebrews 11:3 gives revelation on the power of our words. Hebrews 11:3 (NLT)  says, “By faith we understand that the entire universe was formed at God’s command (by His words,) that what we now see did not come from anything that can be seen.” This verse reveals that words create and carry the force to frame and build with the result of having something good appear that previously wasn’t there. God created the world from words! Go back and read Genesis chapter one and see this for yourself. Words can create what did not previously exist. And words can destroy what does.

Proverbs 18:21 “The tongue has the power of life and death, and those who love it will eat its fruit.”  This truth radically changed my life and it is one of the most critical areas I continue to think about almost daily. So what do we do about it? Read Part 2 next time and I’ll teach you! For today, understand that your words do carry power affecting every situation negatively or positively. They will build and frame your world, or they will deteriorate and tear your world apart!  Ask the Lord to help you listen to what you say,  and ask the Holy Spirit to help you put a leash on your tongue when it’s speaking words that tear down and bring hurt! Next time, Part 2! 

1 Peter 3:10 (NIV) “Whoever would love life and see good days must keep his tongue from evil and his lips from deceitful speech.”  

In His love,
Pastor Tim Burt

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2 thoughts on “The Impact of Words in Life and Relationships – Part One

  1. thank you for this short and powerful article. Just like you thought, we need to regularly renovate our marriage and speak life to it. God bless you richly sir